There's no right way to lose your mind
by Hikaru-kaoru-lover
Summary: "What are you gonna do?" He asks, "When there's no one left to protect you?" His words suprise me, but I decide to answer them honestly, "Scream." I say.


**I do not own hunger games, at all. Saying this at the top, so everyone sees it.**

_**please read before continuing story,- **__This story has little to nothing to do with the original plot of hunger games, and is an OC story. (not in Katniss's POV) _

* * *

I didn't sleep at all last night- as much as I tried I couldn't force my eyes to close for more then a couple minutes at a time.

I sit up on my small bed, rubbing my tired eyes, repeatedly telling myself that today is just like any other day. but I'm only lying to myself, today is _not _like any other day, today is reaping day.

My brother, Aaron- on the bed across the room from me, lets out a deep breath, letting me know he's still a sleep. Which is good, at least one of us can. I make my way off of my bed, and walk to his, shaking him gently. He sighs as his grey 19-year-old eyes open, staring at me.

"What do you want, squirt?" He asks, yawning.

I stare at him, unable to answer, because, truth is, I really don't know what I want. Aaron sits up, and stretches, ignoring my gaze. I can't help but look at my brother, hypnotized, when did he grow up? Just 2 years ago my father died of a heart attack, leaving me and my brother alone in the small house we were raised in (We didn't mind his death much, because he was rarely home anyway) The second we got out of my fathers funeral, my brother went in the woods and hunted for the 2 of us.

Back then Aaron was a skinny ash-blond hair boy with wide eyes thirsty for adventure, fun, anything he could get his hands on. His head was full of childish thoughts that seemed to have no end, he had tons of friends that often spoke to me in baby tones because of my short size. But the man in front of me now, has no friends, his eyes have narrowed a bit, from his year of working in the mines, His blond hair flows down his head looks like its gotten a shade darker due to the fact he doesn't spend so much time in the sun anymore. Aaron is still attractive, though, sometimes when I'm in town, I hear girls whisper about him.

I must have been quiet for a long time because Aaron flicks me on my nose, "Averil Moore, Why aren't you smiling that goofy smile?" I stare at him, he should know why. Today is the day where the 2 people from my district are going to be sentenced to death. We got lucky last year, when Peeta and Katniss both survived.

-x-

Aaron helps me brush my long blond hair as I quickly slip into my reaping dress, which is all black. I let out a sigh, feeling bad for Aaron having to play the roll of mom and dad for me. I can't help but feel as though I'm a toddler, having Aaron look after me since I could walk.

Aaron smiles a sad, smile, brushing my bangs out of my eyes, "You look like mom." I feel my eyes widen at him bringing up my mother- he doesn't do that often, My mother died 5 years ago when she ate a poison berry called night-lock that Aaron accidentally gathered along with other berries. Aaron lost it, and for a couple months my father I had to force him from his bed to eat. I had never seen Aaron in so much pain, ever. And personally, I hope I never see him like that again.

I give Aaron a smile, and then quickly look him over. This year he's to old to enter in the games, so he's not as dressed up as I am, but he's still dressed in his best pants and a clean black shirt.

"Ready to go?" He asks, grimly.

I give him another smile, "No. But we don't have a choice, now do we?" He quickly grabs my hand, looking at me again with a sad gaze. His palms are sweaty. He's worried about me, I know, and he's trying to act strong for me, which I also know. I ignore his sweaty palms and give him a reassuring squeeze. "Let's go, I want to get a good spot." He smiles at my comment but doesn't say anything.

-x-

When we get to the center of the city, I see children lined up along the streets, in age order. Aaron huffs when some peace keepers force him to let me go so I could go to my age group.

When I get to my age group I look around for a familiar face, Kariline- my only friend in the world.

After a while of looking around,I spot her, arguing with her 2 older siblings- I can't hear what she's saying, but her arms are flailing as she yells.

Her older brother along with her older sister are twins, and were in my brothers class- my brother has always classified them as tweedle Dee and tweedle dumb, always causing trouble.

Her brother says something to her, crossing his arms, which makes Kariline turn bright red, turn around, and stomp to our age group, which is 15. Kariline spots me, smiles, and fixes her black hair in a pony tail, while jogging to me.

Once she is with me, she places one of her hand on my shoulder, "Whats wrong with you?" She asks, fixing her dark purple dress with her hands.

"The same thing that's wrong with everyone _else _here, Kariline. Today sucks." I mumble, fixated on Kariline straightening her dress over and over.

"Just because today is terrible doesn't mean tomorrow won't be the best day of your life. You just gotta get there."**(1)** Kariline points her finger up in the air as she talks, making me feel as though she's a teacher giving a lecture.

I resist the urge to cover my ears, as the anthem loudly booms over the speakers. Effie Trinket skips on stage along with Haymitch, Peeta, and Katniss. Peeta and Katniss are holding hands while wearing grim expressions, probably remembering when they had to walk on that stage last year, ready to die.

I quickly look around the crowd for Prim- Katniss Everdeen's little sister, is she safe from the games this year? It would really suck for Katniss if Prim and got chosen this year when Katniss went through all the trouble to keep her safe last year.

My thoughts are interrupted when Effies voice squeaks in the microphone, "Happy hunger games! And may the odds be _ever_in your favor!" I glance at Kariline whose shaking, and then look back at at the two glass balls in the stage. My name is on 20 of those slips- Aaron thinks its only on the necessary slips for my age, which is 15**(2)**. But I snuck tesserae, during the winter when he was having a hard time finding food for us.

"Lets spice things up, gentlemen first!" Effie says skipping happily to the big glass ball on her right. I find myself wondering if she would act the same way if she had children and there was a chance she would draw them. Effie opens the lid and grabs a small piece of paper, unfolding it she giggles, " This person must sounds like a cutie!" Only, being cute won't do anything when your getting your face ripped off by another kid. "Luka Hakes!"

I don't know Luka Hakes, personally, but I do know he has alot of friends, all of which follow him around during school like lost puppy dogs..

Kariline is one of Luka's friends.

Once I realize this, I look at Kariline, only to have my eyes rewarded with the sight of her covering her face in her hands- covering her eyes. She's crying.

I pat Kariline's back, and she turns and hugs me, sobbing in my ears, "I've known him forever! This isn't fair, They can't take him away.." She whispers.

I don't see Luka until he's at the stage, stepping up the stairs. His dark hair isn't styled and flies every-which way. I look at the giant screen, above him, which showed his face, his grey eyes wide and scared, as they dart around, like an animal looking for a place to run.

Effie asks for volunteers- which no one does- which is no surprise. What Katniss did last year was something unheard of in district 12.

Effie shakes his hand, yelling something in the microphone about how district 12 always has the best looking people for the hunger games. Luka smiles a little at her complement, but on the screen you can obviously see tears in his eyes as he walks by Katniss and Peeta.

Effie is now at the girls glass circle. Reaching her hands inside. I could feel my heart pound, _god, please not me, please_. "oooooooh! another good name! I can hear people chanting this!" Effie beams, quickly fixing her hair before her voice squeaks in the microphone, "Averil Moore!"

The gods must not be on my side.

I stare at the stage that Effie, and everyone else are on, hoping to see someone else walking up those stairs, instead I see my face on the screen, grey eyes wide, blond hair still looking nice, but tangling a little in the back, My normally pale face is now chalk white.

"Don't be shy!" Effe giggles into the microphone, "Come on up!"

I question running, only to remember I won't get far. Peace keepers will catch me and bring me to the capital for the games. My eyes close, and I walk to the stage, behind Effie- not even glancing at her. I stand next to Luka, who I can now see is crying a little, not caring if anyone notices. Effie yells a complement at me in the microphone, but I can't hear it, I'm too busy looking at Luka, I've never been this close to him before, his dark hair flows down to the bottom of his ears, and curls on the ends. His grey eyes_-seam eyes- _staring straight ahead of us. I pat his shoulder, and he looks at me, quickly wiping away some tears, "It's gonna be alright." I whisper, and attempt to smile. He stares at me, and I realize how stupid I am, No, it's not going to be alright, both of us are going to die.

Effie goes through with a couple more speeches, an anthem goes off and then me and Luka as whisked away by peace keepers to the justice building.

-x-

I sit on a large red sofa in the justice building, I wonder who visited Katniss when she was here?

The door opens and I'm not surprised to see my brother standing there. He runs to me, picking me up in his arms and hugging me. He tries not to let me see the water that's filling the rims of his eyes- I act like I don't see it.

"Its gonna be alright." I tell Aaron the same thing I said to Luka. My brother give me a smile and hugs me tighter, "I know, I just wish you would stay here, but your not. Your gonna be **there**. And **There** doesn't know how lucky it is."**(3)**

I smile at my brothers words, "Now is the time when your knife skills come in handy." He says, finally looking me in the eye, " use knifes, or rocks, or whatever the hell they give you, grab it and run. Stay hidden." I nod, taking my brothers words in, he reminds me of Yoda at this moment, because he's all smart and wise,

"Your coming home when this is over, and not in a capital coffin. Your not leaving me here alone." I only have time to nod again, when peace keepers come in, "Times up."

I don't let my brother go.

The peace keepers walk to us, and pry me off of him. I sit on the floor and watch as my brother is drug out of the room screaming, "I love you! Be strong, form alliances! Don't-" The doors close, cutting off my brothers last words of wisdom towards me.

The door opens again, and I look up hoping to see my brother, but seeing Kariline instead. She's been crying. She runs to me and lifts me up off the floor so I'm standing. (I'm small for my age, only 5'3 at age 15). I wipe Kariline's eyes, "Don't cry. You can live without me." I mumble, she just shakes her head, not allowing me to stop the tears, "It's not that I can't live without you, it's that I don't even want to try, Averil!" The words shock me, Kariline isn't the type of girl to say touching stuff like that. Kariline reaches in her dress pocket and pulls out a necklace, the same she has worn since the day we met- it was a gift from her grandmother before she died. Kariline thrusts the necklace towards me.

I stare at it.

"Take it." She orders me. I continue stare at the necklace. Kariline grabs my hand, opens it, and places the necklace inside. I look closely at the necklace, its a tiny single white flower, that's in full bloom. Kariline hugs me, "You'll make it. Just cut those people up like you cut those animals your brother brings home from hunting."

I give my best friend a small smile, "Thank you." She hugs me, "And besides, no one will want to kill you! You're so cute!"

We're quiet for a moment and Kariline sighs, "I can't believe they're taking you **and **Luka away from me, I mean, both of you are coming back, so I have nothing to worry about, but.. Who am I gonna talk to about_ my _issues?"

The door opens and peace keepers emerge. Kariline glances at them hatefully. "I guess I gotta go... I'll go visit Luka now!" Kariline slowly backs away from me, Wiping here eyes, roughly with the back of her hands, "Gotta make sure he can't tell I was crying, he's a weakling for tears, y'know?" and skips to the peace keepers, not looking back at me. A peace keeper grabs her arm and finishes leading her out of the door.

I stand there, my heart breaking to pieces as I re-watch in my head the 2 most important people in my life leave- the 2 people who I will never see again.

-x-

In a couple of minutes, peace keepers come and escort me to a car, shoving me inside. I can't help but smile, I've never been in a car before, district 12 doesn't even have many cars. Peeta, Katniss, and Effie squished together sitting awkwardly in the row of seats in front of me. Effie complains about how little room the car provides.

Luka, Haymitch, and me sit in the last row of seats. I find myself wondering why they chose to put a drunk Haymitch next to me and Luka, Haymitch is chunky and and placed in the middle of me and Luka, pushing us against the sides of the car.

His hair looks matted and greasy, like a wild animal, I can't see his eyes because he's passed out. I find myself glaring at him, Me and Luka are about to die, and all he's worried about is sleeping.

Peeta turns around and forces a smile in my direction, "He's not as bad as he smells." I smile back, Peeta must have saw me staring at Haymitch. "I hope so." I say.

Katniss turns to me, "He's the reason me and Peeta are still alive, he gave us advice."

"Excuse me! I think I deserve some credit for that as well!" Effie chirps.

I glance at Luka, whose looking out the window, he catches my eyes, "You scared?" He asks, nod, looking around, Peeta and Katniss aren't looking at us anymore, they are both looking out the windows they sit next to, "Just a little, I'm more upset about leaving my brother behind.." I let out a sigh, trying to keep my eyes from watering.

His hand grabs mine, I look up at him, unsure as to what he's doing, he smiles, "It's gonna be alright." He whispers the words I told him on stage, and squeezes my hand.

-x-

The car jerks to a stop, forcing my head into the back of Peeta's seat. Luka lets go of my hand, and rubs his cheek, which must have hit the metal part on the back of Katniss's seat because it's bleeding a little. Haymich quickly wakes up, thrashing his arms around n panic, hitting me in the arm twice.

The doors open and everyone is drug out of the car and in front of a train.

And cameras.

The peace keepers have to push past rabid cameramen and reporters to make a decent walkway for me and Luka to walk through. I lose track of Peeta, Katniss, and Haymitch. But Effies pink hair bounces in front of me and Luka, so we follow. We only stop when we are at the door of the train, Effie smiles, "Let the world see your adorable faces!" She gestures to the cameramen.

"I'd rather not," I mumble, still facing the door immaturely. Effie stomps her foot and turns me around, "Averil! let the capital know what district 12 has to offer!" She demands.

I allow Effie to turn me towards the cameramen and reporters.

_'...what district 12 has to offer!...'_

I glance at Luka, whos grinning like a child, waving even. This is what our district has to offer, 2 skinny 'adorable' teens- who don't know the meaning of the sentence_ 'I'm full." _Luka grabs my hand, and waves it in the air like he was celebrating something. I stare confused at him, he only returns a smile.

Finally the train door opens, I yank my hand from his and board first, not even waiting for Effie.

Katniss, Peeta, and Haymitch are already on board, sitting lazily on a couch.

"If you guys were in here all along you should have let us in sooner." I say, coldly, and walk to the bathroom, washing the hand that Luka grabbed.

Once I'm done, I look up in the mirror, Luka's standing there, staring at the hand I had just washed, the one he just held in the air like a throphy. I don't know why, but I'm mad at him.

"Did me grabbing your hand really offend you that much, or do you still believe in cooties?" He asks, leaning on the door frame.

I ignore his comments, pushing past him back into the room that everyone else was in. "Where am I going to sleep?" I ask, no, order staring at Effie, who seems to know everything.

"You haven't even ate yet.." Peeta starts, "The food is really good." He looks at Katniss, smiling a little, " Like the lamb stew."

There's a long silence, followed by a large _Bloop_. I look around to see that drunken Haymich has fallen on the floor.

"Let me get this straight," I start, staring at Haymich, and lifting my hand to point at him, "You said _he's_ the reason both of you are still alive?"

When they nod, I nearly flip, "But look at him! He's drunk, out of it! How can he help when he's in this state? Is he not going to help me and Luka at all?" I can feel myself shaking, "Or .. Or is he going to be like this? I swear, if I die because he doesn't do anything except get drunk and sleep off hangovers, I'll..I'll.." I don't finish the threat, not knowing how to.

Effie had disappeared somewhere during my temper tantrum. Katniss and Peeta are both looking at me with identical smirks.

"This is Deja vu." Katniss mutters, and lets out a laugh, why is this so funny to her? Luca and my lives are in their hands!

"Averil, our rooms are over here," I turn to see Luka, in the hall. I let out a huff of air before walking to him. I wonder how much of the tantrum he heard.

"I'm sorry. For grabbing your hand." He says, when we get to the door that must be mine. "I don't know what I was thinking."

"You were having fun, it's ok." I say. Not meeting his grey eyes. "Better have fun now...We'll be ripping off each others heads in a couple of days."

He smiles at me, "keep your hopes up, maybe they'll let 2 people win like they did with Katniss and Peeta."

I open my door and go inside leaving Luka outside. Immediately forcing myself to forget the words Luka said, The capital will not, under any circumstances, Let what happened with Katniss and Peeta happen again.

* * *

Don Don **Don **!

How did you like it? Is it ok? should I trash it? Are the characters OOC? This is just a random Dabble, so I don't care If I delete it or not.

I know the way she was chosen is super lame, but that has alot to do with the story later. so bare with me! xD And I'm also aware that the year after the year Katniss and Peeta win is quater quell, but like I said on the top, this story has little to nothing to do with the original plot.

I've already finished the second, and thrid chapter, but I will not post them until I know what ya'll think. (the story gets better after this, I hope.)

**1-**thats a quote I heard, and decided I had to put it in here.

**2- **I honestly have no idea how many times their name is really entered, so lets just pretend that the number of times their entered = their age. Ect. 12=their name is entered 12 times. 13-13 times.

**3- **Another cute quote I heard.


End file.
